Once upon a time, a man ran to the police station and the following ensued between the sergeant who was the station leader and the man.
COMPLAINANT: Good morning officer. Please l am here to get some policemen to follow me down to arrest a certain notorious criminal who has been terrorising my life and my family. He even threatened to kill me.
SERGEANT: Alright, let's go.
COMPLAINANT: No sir, you can't go alone. Take at least five other policemen along with you.
SERGEANT: So, you mean that l should close down the station because of just one arrest?
Who is that idiot that l can't handle myself? Look, l am sergeant kill and go. No criminal dares me. You will pity him the way in which l will single handedly cuff his hands and drag him to the station.
COMPLAINANT: Sir, if it means closing down the station because of him, please do it. You don't know this fellow. He is a ruthless killer. Don't ever go there all alone. He is dangerous.
SERGEANT: Because of all these things that you are even saying about him would force me to punish him severely before cuffing his hands. Who is that baga? Son of nobody.
His days on earth are numbered. But since you are afraid that someone must go with us, then let me call corporal Matthias to follow us.
But l bet you. His going there is of no use. He will just stand like a photograph hanging on the wall which has no job. I will slap the hell out of him, if he tries to resist arrest.
On getting there, he bang on the door saying, "You this miscreant. If you know what is good for you, just stretch your hands forward for me to cuff them".
SUSPECT: Na who chop belleful say he nor know him papa, say na my house he come dey disturb. Na God go punish him full generation.
SERGEANT: Common, shut up your dirty mouth and come out or else, l sergeant killer will send you to your useless grave.
SUSPECT: Na which person name l dey hear so? So you this ekelebe get liver to enter my kaban, abi?
You nor dey fear to come to the house of twenty years juguda, no more jail? The person nor dey fear face? Abi, you don sign your death?
Ekelebe, na your dead body dem go carry comot from here today. He be like say you want make l take you nak ground skater for here now, now. Na die dey call you so. Just wait make l hold you first.
As he walked towards them, the sergeant sense danger because he was about seven feet tall.
And he said to corporal Matthias, " Now, corporal, go behind him and hold him from behind while l will hold his hands".
CORPORAL MATTHIAS: Oga, l have never given birth to any child. My marriage ceremony is coming up next month. I can't afford to die a childless life. A million toads can never challenge the mamba to a duel. Back tyre can never overtakes the front one. Tortoise doesn't drinks beer, but water. Oga, l don go. Bye-bye.
SERGEANT: central police station! Emergency! Emergency! Emergency!!! We are in danger. As a matter of urgency, send all the policemen in the station down for reenforcement. If it means closing down the station, do that immediately. Be fast. Death is drawing nearer. The over zealous he goat has mistakenly changed the Lion in his den.
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