HUGE EXPECTATIONS IN CHAOS!!!

ONE MORNING, SOME KIDNAPPERS LAID AN AMBUSH ON THE ROAD LEADING TO A LOCAL. PRIMARY SCHOOL FOR KIDS GOING TO SCHOOL. THEY STOPPED THE KIDS AND ASKED THEM THEIR FATHERS' NAMES AND WHAT THEY DO FOR A LIVING. A BOY OF ABOUT EIGHT YEARS OLD WAS  ASKED HIS FATHER'S NAME AND OCCUPATION. AND THE BOY SAID, "MY FATHER'S NAME IS AMBASSADOR KAIN-KAIN AKPETESHI  AND HE IS AN AMBASSADOR." THEY BECAME INFESTED WITH JOY AND THEY TOOK HIM AWAY QUICKLY TO THEIR HIDEOUT. THEY CONCLUDED THAT ONE HUNDRED MILLION DOLLARS RANSOM MUST BE PAID BY HIS FATHER BEFORE HE WOULD BE RELEASED. THE KIDNAPPERS WHO WERE FIVE IN NUMBER, SHARED THE MONEY IN THE FOLLOWING RATIOS: 3:4:5:6:7. AND EACH OF THEM BUDGETED WHAT HE WILL DO WITH HIS MONEY EVENTHOUGH, THEY HAVE NOT EVEN COMMUNICATED WITH THE FATHER. THE BOY SAID THAT HIS FATHER HAS NO PHONE AND SO THE BOY GAVE THEM ONE OF THEIR NEIGHBOUR'S  PHONE NUMBER. THEY CALLED THE MAN AND TOLD HIM TO GIVE THE PHONE TO AMBASSADOR KAIN-KAIN AKPETESHI THAT THEY WANT TO SPEAK WITH HIM  BECAUSE HIS SON WAS WITH THEM. THE NEIGHBOUR TOLD THEM THAT THEY CANNOT SPEAK WITH HIM BECAUSE HE GOT HIMSELF DRUNK AND HE WAS ON THE FLOOR SLEEPING. 'IN THAT CASE, LET US SPEAK WITH HIS SECRETARY OR OTHER MEMBERS OF STAFF OF THE EMBASSY; THE KIDNAPPERS SAID. 'I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT;  SAID THE NEIGHBOUR. THE KIDNAPPERS SAID TO THE NEIGHBOUR, "MR MAN, LISTEN TO US AND LISTEN WELL. WE HAVE KIDNAPPED THE AMBASSADOR'S SON AND IF HE FAILS TO PAY US THE SUM OF ONE HUNDRED MILLION DOLLAR  CASH BY TOMORROW EVENING, THE BOY WILL BE DEAD. HE SHOULDN'T TRY TO OUTSMART US OR EVEN INFORM THE POLICE." IT WAS THEN THE NEIGHBOUR REALIZED THAT THE KIDNAPPERS MAY HAVE MISTAKEN THE FATHER OF THE BOY TO BE A REAL AMBASSADOR AND SO HE CALLED THEM AND SAID, "MY DEAR BROTHERS, THAT BOY'S FATHER IS NOT AN AMBASSADOR OF ANY SORT, HE ONLY GOT THAT TITLE SHIP FROM HIS PALM WINE DRINKERS MEMBERS BECAUSE HE DRINKS PALM WINE MORE THAN A BEE. HE IS NOT EVEN AWARE SINCE YESTERDAY THAT HIS SON HAS BEEN MISSING. HE IS SO IRRESPONSIBLE THAT HE CAN'T EVEN PAY FOR HIS ONE-ROOM MONTHLY RENT. ONLY GOD KNOWS HOW THE BOY MANAGES TO FEED AND GO TO SCHOOL. HE IS THE KING OF THE DRUNKARDS CLUB. A VERY WAYWARD CLUB WHOSE MEMBERS ARE VAGABONDS. HENCE THEY ARE CALLED ALIAS KAIN-KAIN AKPETESHI. THESE ARE OTHER NAMES FOR USELESS MEN WHO SLEEP ALONG ROAD SIDES IN GUTTERS. IN MOST CASES, WHEN THEY ARE INTOXICATED, WE THE NEIGHBOURS NORMALLY CONTRIBUTE MONEY FOR TUGS TO FLOG THEM TO NORMAL." THE KIDNAPPERS WERE SO ANGRY AND THEY ASKED THE BOY TO TAKE THEM TO HIS FATHER. THEY WERE SO ANGRY  WHEN THEY SAW THE SUPPOSED AMBASSADOR HALF NAKED AND IN COMA. THEY FLOGGED HIM AND HE BECAME CONSCIOUS AND THEY FLED AWAY. TWO DAYS LATER, THE BOY CALLED THE KIDNAPPERS AND HE THANKED THEM FOR THE PALATABLE MEAL WHICH HE ATE IN THEIR HIDEOUT AND FOR FLOGGING HIS FATHER TO CONSCIOUSNESS WITHOUT PAYING NOTHING TO TUGS. (THE END)