Thursday, 23 March 2023

THE POWER OF THE NAMES OF THE BIBLE!

There was this couple. The husband was a pastor and the wife a chorister in the church. They have four children. A girl and three boys. Now, the girl who was the eldest grew up to become a professional harlot. The first son grew up to become a thief and a kidnapper. The second son grew up to become a giant about twenty four feet tall while the third son was a dwarf about three feet tall.

Now, the couple were of an average height. With these abnormalities in the four children, the phenomenon became a source of great concern to both the public and members of the church owning to the fact that their parents were well known Christians.

One day, a foreign journalist came to have an interview with the couple. Fortunately, the couple were at home. After they had exchanged greetings, the journalist introduced herself and told them her reason of coming. The following conversations took place between them.

JOURNALIST: Sir, you and your wife are well known Christians. But going by the phenomenon of the four children you people have; what do you as a Christian have to say?

PASTOR:  Well, thank you very much. You see, the Bible says that the devil has no good things on him. All he has for the servants of God is torture and affliction. This is one of his handiworks. But he had failed because he couldn't killed my wife and I hence he inflicted my children just like he did to Job according to the Bible.

JOURNALIST: Madam, do you share the same thought with your husband?

WIFE: Not all! The truth is that this time around, the devil is out of this case contrary to my husband's claims that the devil was responsible. He is indirectly the cause of these abnormalities in the children because believe it or not, the words and names in the Bible have powers!

JOURNALIST: Madam, this is a very weighty allegation against your husband who is a pastor. Can you substantiate your claims?

WIFE:  Thank you very much. You see, man is a man! Whether being a pastor or an ordinary person when it comes to sex, they are the same.

You see, after our marriage, l was still a virgin. The first day we slept together was Sunday night and the theme of his preaching in the church that day was  "JOSHUA CHAPTER 2.
THE TWO SPIES AND RAHAB THE HARLOT".
He said that a harlot's job is not bad after all because Rahab, the prostitute was forgiven by God. Our first meeting that night resulted into the pregnancy of our first child who is our first daughter who is today an international harlot.

The second time of our meeting was also a Sunday night. On that Sunday in the church, the theme of his preaching was "MATTHEW CHAPTER 26 VERSE 15. JUDAS ISCARIOT BETRAYED JESUS"  which talks about Judas Iscariot who betrayed Jesus Christ. He said that being a thief and a betrayer sometimes is good. That if not that Judas Iscariot had a mind of stealing, he won't have betrayed Jesus Christ and had it been Jesus Christ was not betrayed, he couldn't have died and saved mankind.

Our meeting that night resulted into the pregnancy of our first son who is today a kidnapper who betrayed his master at his working place and kidnapped him and a ransom of thirty million naira paid to secured his release. Today the boy in question is an international thief and a betrayal.

The third time of our meeting was also a Sunday night.
That very Sunday, the theme of his preaching in the church were "SAMSON AND DELILAH AND DAVID AND GOLIATH" Ist Samuel chapter 17, verses 1and Judges chapter 16 verses 4 to 30. He extols the power of Samson on how he pushed down the Philistines huge temple and tower of Dagon, the philistines gods and killed a lion with his bare hands. He said that had it been he was born a giant, he could have become a heavy weight boxer.

Our meeting together as husband and wife that night resulted into the pregnancy of our second son who is also our third child who is today a dreaded giant that fights daily and destroys buildings and taunts and intimidates people with his giant stature!

The fourth time, we met as husband and wife was also a Sunday night. That Sunday, his sermon in the church was "LUKE CHAPTER 19 VERSUS 1 TO 10. ZACCHAEUS AND JESUS CHRIST". He praised short people. He said that short people have more faith than tall people hence the shortish Zaccchaeus deemed it fit to have climbed up a sycamore tree for him to see Jesus Christ. He said that he would have love to be like Zacchseus than to be a pastor.

It was our meeting as husband and wife that night that resulted into the pregnancy of our last son who is short like Zacchaeus.  He is even shorter than Zacchaeus. Well, that is the history of the four children that we have and how they became what they are today.

IMMEDIATELY, SHE FINISHED SPEAKING, BOTH HER HUSBAND AND THE JOURNALIST COLLAPSED!

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